What is it with all these phone things? Everyone I know is constantly staring at a small hand-held device of some sort. So many are utterly distracted from any slavering fiend who may be sitting next to them, ready to drool across their pastry.
Surely they must be expecting the arrival momentous news in the form of a call, e-mail or tiny cryptic chunk of meaning–News more momentous than the quivering rim of salient reality so completely neutralized by the promise of a post-present present. Perhaps my associates await word of better jobs. Maybe they worry that the death of some distant Argentine might pass unnoticed.
At this very moment I look across the lunch counter here at the HowdyLand commissary and see clearly that the gentleman across from me is unaware of the cretin with a garden claw approaching him from behind. Oh look, my pie is here!
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This series of daily news broadcasts is intended to provide listeners with hard facts about the hard times in which we live. --Stanley
Mr. Mueller planned a smaller picture, but was distracted by his ticker tape.