It seems like only yesterday when, during the go-go-late 1990s, billions of dollars were shoveled feverishly into the gaping maw of the bright and shiny new reality of the Worldwide Web. Important youngish people eagerly pumped stock values to preposterous heights while their newly birthed startups rocketed toward stratospheric heights. Too bad most of them were fools. Too bad they failed to see the future value of steam.
We here at HowdyLand.com did gaze fixedly into the onrushing future, however, and despite blinking in disbelief at the repeal of the venerable Glass-Steagall Act in 1999, we threw every last asset into a tried and true technology requiring the use of gloves and hats. And today we are proud to announce that we will now power our vast server patches with super-heated water powering incomprehensible dynamos.
We hope you enjoy this powerful new engine. Unlike other media nodes, such as they are, we will be forced by this new delivery system to present only the toxic and highly concentrated facts surrounding our nation’s decline and muttering decay.
Please don’t touch anything as it may explode.
Share on Facebook
This series of daily news broadcasts is intended to provide listeners with hard facts about the hard times in which we live. --Stanley
There will soon be a remake of the old “Concentration” TV series. The game board, and the contestants’ prize sliders, will be powered by good old fashioned coal. Stagehands will shovel mounds of anthracite into large backstage bins. The flames will rise high above 30 Rockefeller Center, and those 30 numbered trilons will swivel as they’ve never swiveled before.
The producers of “Match Game” are also looking into bringing back that show, using mostly bituminous. “Slide it, Earl!”